LONDON—Londoners united to salute the original Man of Steel who was totally emotionless as he watched a mother desperately scrambles to retrieve her child from the Underground train tracks, according to reports.
Sources said while Man of Steel initially had his back turned as the child’s buggy rolled onto the high-voltage tracks, he remained totally unruffled as he turned round to see a woman on the tracks struggling to hand over the child-in-a-buggy to a male relative on the platform.
“This immovable man-of-cast-iron is really cool,” said Lucy Mayfield, a commuter. “I’d give him a kiss rather than a punch. He wasn’t shocked at all to see a woman and child on the tracks.”
“It’s like this happens every day on the tube,” continued Mayfield. “Women and kids love to play hide-and-seek on the rail tracks just before the trains arrive. So what do you do except stay calm and watch the movie unfold. Keep your arms around your midriff, and keep listening to your music as some sort of soundtrack to this movie as mother and child dice with death.”
Londoners told reporters that even as child is safely back on the platform, there’s no need for Man of Steel to step closer to the mother and offer her a hand back on the platform. With mother and child safe again, no need to empathise with the distraught couple by offering comforting words such as, ‘hope the baby is ok?’
When Man of Steel was tracked down by reporters he was really humble about his starring role in the movie saying, “I don’t see why I should be praised for being so smug and detached in the face of real and present danger to fellow commuters. I was only following the sign that says ‘Stand Behind The Yellow Lines.”
“Okay, maybe I’m the new face of machismo,” Man of Steel continued. “Whoever said chivalry is dead?”
At post time, Man of Steel said he’s glad everyone all over the world could watch his finest Hard-As-Nail moment on Youtube: ‘Terrifying moment child in a buggy is blown on to London tube tracks’.by